Step Two

Working on step two....again:

Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

Gratefully, when I came in, I did believe in a Power.  I just wasn't so sure about the restoration to sanity. But doesn't that mean that my Power wasn't very powerful? Most of us are asked to write a two-sided list.  What my God is and is not.  So here is what I have so far (you get to see it before even my sponsor):

What God is:

Just

Long-suffering,

Loving,

Patient,

Kind,

Merciful,

Loyal

Holy

Present

Caring

A good listener

Faithful

What God Isn’t:

Petty

Mean

Impatient

Harsh

Critical

Condemning

Uncaring

Neglectful

So many find it difficult to believe in a power greater than themselves but why? Isn't that which made their life unmanageable greater than themselves?  Overspending, overeating, undereating, self-pity, codependency, __________(fill in the blank).  If any of us feel that there is an aspect of our life that controls us, perhaps that is our current God. 

 My own personal list of powers greater than myself:

Physical: 

Multiple sclerosis,

Any given disease

The church as a whole,

Other’s personalities,

Alcohol

Nature,

Mental:

Other’s thoughts and actions

Obsessions

Pride

Lust

Greed

Spiritual:

GOD

Which of the above can keep me from drinking, delving into pride, filling myself with needless material items, the desire to restrict my eating, etc.?

"The spiritual starter kit. All of this theology stuff can seem downright confusing. It can even appear to be a barrier in the path of sobriety. We A.A.s are fortunate in having a spiritual starter kit, so to speak, in chapter 4 of the Big Book. It is suggested as a sure fire method of coming to know a spiritual power. Here it is (we have supplied the bold style to selected characters):

Step 2.1. We found that as soon as we were able to lay aside prejudice and...[Big Book page 46, line 15]

Step 2.2. ...express even a willingness to believe in a Power greater than ourselves, we commenced to get results, even though it was impossible for any of us to fully define or comprehend that Power, which is God. [Big Book page 46, line 16]

Step 2.3. Do not let any prejudice you may have against spiritual terms deter you from honestly asking yourself what they mean to you...we had to begin somewhere, so we used our own conception, however limited it was. [Big Book page 47, line 4]

Step 2.4. ...As soon as a man can say that he does believe or is willing to believe, we emphatically assure him that he is on his way. [Big Book page 47, line 16]

In short form the kit might read: a) Set aside all prejudice (both belief and disbelief about God and religions), b) Become willing to believe, c) Study all spiritual concepts, and formulate an initial—even conditional or tentative—conception of God, and d) Be persistent in testing the state of your belief and knowledge.

It has been repeatedly proven among us that upon this simple cornerstone a wonderfully effective spiritual structure can be built. [Big Book page 47, line 19]"

Coming in, I scoffed at the idea that I needed spiritual kindergarten., I grew up knowing my Higher Power. And yet, my life was not working. It had become unmanageable.

  (We have made)....clear three pertinent ideas:

(a) That we were alcoholic (or whatever) and could not manage our own lives.
(b) That probably no human power could have relieved our alcoholism.
(c) That God could and would if He were sought. [Big Book page 60, line 15]

He has come to all who have honestly sought Him. When we drew near to Him He disclosed Himself to us! [Big Book page 57, line 8]

I have to say, that though I knew Him, coming in, He has disclosed Himself to me in such a greater way upon my seeking Him in this simple and honest way.